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Personal Growth

How to be Less Critical of Yourself and Others

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Enjoy topics around success, mindfulness and personal growth amongst others interesting, helpful and relevant to the busy world we live in today. 

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How to be Less Critical of Yourself and Others

We all have our own set of values. While having values is very positive, there’s also a risk of getting over-enthusiastic and expecting others to behave a certain way. It’s important to realize that there’s no single way to live life or view the world. You’re limiting your personal growth and enjoyment when you expect […]

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We all have our own set of values. While having values is very positive, there’s also a risk of getting over-enthusiastic and expecting others to behave a certain way. It’s important to realize that there’s no single way to live life or view the world. You’re limiting your personal growth and enjoyment when you expect others to live according to your rules.

Being critical of others has additional consequences. If you’re hard on others, you’re also hard on yourself. Your self-esteem and happiness suffer.

Life is simply more enjoyable when we accept others and ourselves.

Use these strategies to remove your expectations and be less critical:

  1. Be aware of critical thoughts. Everything has a beginning. Before you can make critical judgments and say critical things, there has to be a critical thought. This is your cue to change your thought process.
    • Monitor your thoughts and remind yourself to be more open-minded.

  2. Pause for five seconds and take a deep breath. In most cases, you’re safe until you open your mouth. When you find yourself feeling judgmental, stop and take a short pause. You’ll interrupt your thought pattern and give yourself a chance to think before you say something you might regret.
    • How many times have you wished you could take back something you’ve said? That doesn’t have to happen again in the future.

  3. Understand that people, including yourself, are doing the best they can. That’s not to say that everyone is living up to their potential. But everyone has their own unique past, tragedies, upbringing, health issues, and way of viewing the world. Faced with the same experiences, you can’t be certain you would do any better.
    • The person you’re judging might be doing a lot better than you think if only you knew the entire story.

  4. Avoid stereotyping. There are CEOs with tattoos and wonderful parents that used to be exotic dancers. You’re only fooling yourself if you believe you can judge someone based on a couple of characteristics or facts. Are you strong and patient enough to determine the truth about the other person?

  5. Find a role model. You know someone that’s very accepting of everyone. Sit down and speak with them. Ask them how they manage to be so non-critical of everyone. Ask them what they think when they see a Goth teenager covered in tattoos and piercings.
    • Their thoughts are the answer to your struggle.

  6. The past doesn’t have to equal the future. Everyone makes mistakes. Those mistakes don’t have to be repeated. Understand that people can learn from their errors. You wouldn’t want to be judged by your greatest mistake, nor would it provide an accurate view of you. Give others the same consideration.

  7. Respect the freedom of others. No one elected you to decide how others should live their lives. It’s arrogant and delusional to believe that your way is the right way for everyone. You have the option to live your life the way you choose. Provide the same freedom to others.

  8. Let go of your expectations. Having expectations is a form of trying to control others. Become more flexible. When you have expectations, they’re sure to be violated. There’s only one way you can feel at that point: upset.
    • Let go of your expectations and accept the outcome without judgment.

If you have a habit of being critical, you’ll get more out of life if you reverse that tendency. This is a great opportunity to be patient and understanding with yourself. The people that annoy us are here to teach us about ourselves.

Make an effort to learn more about someone you don’t like. You might find that your first impression was incorrect!

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MOONologer, Manifesting Generator, ENNEAGRAM 8, CHRONIC OVERACHIEVER, NATURE LOVER.

Hi, I'm Angie.
Your New Success + Mindset Coach.

I’ve shifted from the corporate world into the helping industry at a time where major change can happen including revolutionizing the workplace and life in general. When people are fed up with living in survival mode and held back by conditioning and limiting beliefs it’s time to shift and I can help. 

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It finally clicked!

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Much of the work I have done has been with feelings, needs and with my subconscious. Rewiring programming that "I didn't matter" and "I am not enough" has been a journey. If I struggle with escaping to work when personal life got to be too much, I'm sure others do as well.  If I didn't learn how to address emotions and share my needs, I'm sure others have as well. If I was dealing with these inner barriers of "I don't matter" and "I am not enough" others must as well.
Creating lasting change has given me confidence in dealing wiht life issues instead of avoiding them. This eve led me to becoming a life coach so I can help others overcome their limitations. Going deeper is where I found the impactful transformation and I want to share that with others. Rewiring old programming to overcome self-limiting beliefs, learn how to feel the feels and release negative emotions in others is my mission. I've found so many clients dealing with the same inner barriers and avoidance in personal life.  I only wished I could scale the solution I found to work with so many. Then I started to think about how I love using apps and what if that is the solution. I use an app for everything and drove digital solutions in my previous career. A few of my coaching clients inspired me to come up with a solution for convenience and deeper, continuous work in between sessions.  Personal transformation journeys are just that, personal. They can also be very deeply complicated based on old programming and experiences in life that have led you to this point. It's the part of the iceberg we can't see. 1:1 coaching is a great way to break through self-limiting beliefs, establish healthy habits and mindfulness. It can also get expensive. I wanted to bring an affordable journey that is effective, proven and you can do at your own pace!

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